No worries about their pink strip clashing with any other team jumpers.

A new team has arrived on the international roster, with the discovery in the jungles of south-east Asia of the Laos Elephants.

The team recently travelled to Hanoi where it was part of a tri-nations tournament involving the Vietnam Swan and the Thailand Tigers. The Lao lads seem to have made a reasonable fist of things, although they lost both games. The Tigers won comfortably in both their matches to win the series.
1. Vietnam Swans 5.2.32 def. Lao Elephants 3.5.23

2. Lao Elephants 4.4.28 def by Thailand Tigers 10.3.63

3. Vietnam Swans 3.0.18 def by Thailand Tigers 12.6.78

Word from the Mekong is that the Laos team train at the 'world famous sandpit' and operate under the banner 'Pants down, Trunks up'.

Asia's newest footy side had 13 players make the trip from the Lao PDR to pull on the pink and grey jumper (pictured above), augmented by eight curious Irishmen who had seen them carrying a Sherrin at the airport and decided to come along for a kick.

The Elephants went down to the Vietnam Swans by nine points in their first-ever match, a gallant effort in extreme heat and humidity with a number of players (not least the Irish) having never played competitive footy before. In the following two games, the Thailand Tigers proved themselves a long way ahead of their Indochinese regional rivals, defeating the Swans 85-21 and the Elephants 63-28.

In a side note for trivia buffs, international footy identity "the Big Rooster" both designed the jumper and took the field for the Elephants, meaning he has now played for teams from 19 countries.

Bintangs struggle

The Brunei Sharks are also lurking around the place, with a game scheduled against Vietnam.

Another post-Champs tour result is in. The Jakarta Bintangs travelled to Singapore last month and lost a close tussle. Final score: Bintangs 9.11 (65) to Wombats 12.14 (86).

The Bali Geckos earlier retained the Java-Bali Cup for the third year in a row, beating home nation rivals Jakarta.
Bali Geckos 14 15 99
Jakarta Bintangs 7 16 58.

The Japanese grand final.

Dingoes bark in Japan, Bali win 9s
The Japan AFL's Top League expanded to outside the Tokyo area this year with the arrival of the Osaka Dingoes bringing the numer of clubs to six. The Dingoes made the local Grand Final but lost to the Tokyo Goannas by 24 points.

Bali beat the Singapore Wombats in the final Bali 9s in front of an impressive crowd that included the Geelong Premiership team. The Geckos are now preparing to host the 2008 Bali 9s Masters, to be held June 7.

China news
In other Chinese footy news, the two expat-based mainland clubs clashed in Shanghai on the weekend of November 10, with the Beijing Bombers having their first-ever away win over the Shanghai Tigers.

At the grassroots level, the Tianjin Normal University (TJNU) footy club has recently branched out to form a club at its Yangcun campus, the newbies debuting last week in an all-Chinese three-team tournament in Tianjin.

The TJNU City and TJNU Yangcun teams were joined by the SiShen Bombers, the local development squad of the Beijing Bombers, with around 50 Chinese students aged 18-22 taking part. The TJNU City side came out on top on the day, defeating Yangcun 36-25 and the SiShen Bombers 43-13, in a tournament enjoyed by all despite the wind and cold weather.

THE FIREBREATHER

Triplets, triplets, triplets
No stranger to defying the odds, Shannon Morgan is about to become a father of triplets! Shannon and wife Liz will be one of the one in 8,100 pregancies that result in triplets. The sad news is it looks like the amazing news will see the couple returning to Oz to take on the fun-filled challenge in the company of family and friends. The head-wetting celebration will have to be scheduled as a three-day blow-out.

Squash comp resumes ... MAYBE
The intra-club squash comp is now into its second year without reaching denoument. Rivalling the America's Cup as the world's oldest trophy, it was set to continue on Dec 17 when Prez Byrne was at long last to come out of hiding behind six months of excuses to take on Bogan. Alas, he reneged on the booking again so we wait. A forfeit looms large. The winner will play Feeney in the final.

Get a run on
Stoochy Junior Burger and Tommy Polk took part in the weekend's (Dec 2) run aropund Disneyland. The pair clocked in a half marathon in the more than respectable time of 1hr 42min. Peripheral Dragon tipster Woodsy did the 10km earlier in the morning in a reputed 51min.

Deuce, Kyoko and Jake

Pending nuptials
Physio Faulks and Lisa Martin have both updated their Facebook status to .... is engaged. Awwwww

Dragon in baby shock
In one of the more surprising developments of the year, newly married former Dragon Garry 'Deuce Bigalow' Frenklah has become a dad. Kyoko delived a 3.3kg (51cm) boy, Jake Kou Frenklah (Nakamura) at 7.49am, November 14 after what the Bigalow described as a "short but intense one-hour natural labour". Short but intense sessions with Bigalow have indeed been productive affairs over the years. Wife, child and father are all doing well.
For those who don't know, Deuce is a club legend of long standing, his status being particularly impressive given he played one game and is rarely seen. He managed to break his wrist in the Dragons worst ever drubbing - but played on regardless. Relive those heady days by going to June 2002 Jakarta match report under Match Results section. It's a good read. Congrats to the Frenklah family.

Faulkner the fundraiser: led the Warriors team of Dragons on the hike from hell.

Mixed results for Dragons hikers
Faulks and Ronnie have once again conquered the MacLehose Trailwalker, marching the requisite 100km in 23hrs 40 mins, picking uip speed over the final stages once they had offloaded some luggage. A brave effort from Dicko saw him struggle to the 70km mark before bowing out of the gruelling event. President Byrne faltered early, falling by the wayside after 25km.

"We last saw him curled up on the track in foetal position," said the unflappable Faulks.

Byrnes had boasted that he would devour the distance with a training build-up to the event that centred around drinking heavily at the Spring Racing Carnival in Melbourne and avoiding any hiking in order to "save myself for the big day".

The main page website photo was taken during a basic level hike of the the Dragons Back, and should have served as a prescient warning of what was to follow in the Trailwalker.

Irrespective of the result, the four lads are worthy of high praise for raising lots of money for a worthy charity.

Further details and photos as they emerge.

If any other Dragons took part, please email media@hk-dragons.com with details.

Melbourne Cup - rating 'dead'
Here is a tip you all should heed. For the Melbourne Cup, Bogan is betting on Zipping. He has a proud tradition in the Cup - this year will likely mark the 30th time in 30 years of betting on the cup that he has not picked the winner. He has picked three horses that died during the running of the race (Bold Print, Dulcify, and, if recalled correctly, Think Big). So don't bet on Zipping.
Rumour file: it is not true that Bogan bet on Shane Sibraa's horse when it died mid-race a couple of weeks back at Happy Valley.
A large contingent will be at the general public outer area ($10 entry) on Tues night of the Cup at Happy Valley. So giddy-on up.
[UPDATE: Zipping has just finished 4th behind winner Efficient]

Royal birthday
Former First Lady Dorian Loi-on Lai Robertson celebrated her birthday on November10. Public holidays in her honour were held in Taiwan, Antigua, DR Congo, Palau, Comoros, Lesotho and Anguilla.

New York, New Sobriety
The Jackal has reported (on Nov6) that he has just enjoyed/endured his first alcohol-free week in living memory since arriving in New York. He duly reported this 7 days, 0 hours and 3 minutes after taking off from Hong Kong, so he is obviously pleased with himself.

Marcel Marceau
Spotted in LKF: That man of few words and plenty of action, Gareth, was recently spotted in LKF doing some moves. When asked by a new acquaintance if he played golf, he deferred from comment, preferring to launch into a Michael Jackson dance routine that included the moon walk, before swivelling and launching into a beautifully choreographed golf swing. He returned to his beer without actually clarifying whether he played golf.

Web traffic report
September 21 saw one of the busiest days ever for the website, with nearly 250 people tuning in during the day to get all the juice on the Beach Party and Vietnam Tour. September and October were pretty steady, with around 30,000 page views. Around the world, Ireland made its first appearance in the traffic Top Ten, while the UAE, newcomers to Asian footy, continue to tune in to our exploits. The percentage of our total hits coming from Australia also rose last month to about 30 percent.

September top 10........................OctoberTop 10
United States...............................United States
Singapore....................................Japan
China...........................................Great Britain
Great Britain................................UAE
Netherlands.................................Singapore
Canada........................................Thailand
Vietnam........................................Vietnam
Malaysia.......................................China
Thailand........................................Canada
Ireland..........................................Malaysia
(Big-hitting Hong Kong and Australia not included)

... but July was the biggest yet
July saw a record number of readers tune into the website. Almost 1100 different visitors clocked up a maassive 134,000 hits, or 65,500 page views, more than double the previous month.
Nothing breeds success like success. the Asian Champs victory saw a deluge of traffic, including another record, the single-day high of 230 visitors on July 16 and 6000-plus page views, about six times the average.
Internationally, Farmer single-handedly managed to elevate Italy into the top ten for the first time during his holiday, while our expats in Britain took it back to top billing.

The Dragons' movers and shakers

.................................
Firebreather archive
All Firebreather columns are now archived every now and then. See News menu for all previous stories and columns.
.................................
DROP PUNT US A LINE
We're always keen to hear a candidate for Quote of the Week or Excuse of the Week.
Or have you got any goss' you wanna spread, news tips we simply have to know about or cries for help that need an audience? Drop a line to media@hk-dragons.com
The editor will guarantee confidentiality, while ensuring no-one threatens us with libel or physical retribution.

The Dragons: winners off and on the field in 2008

Wan Chai - Aaron Bester won the Dragons highest individual honour at the 2007 awards night on friday at Heat in Wan Chai. He pocketed the Ray Wood Medal as fairest and best, pipping runner-up Shannon Morgan, to join a pantheon of champions on the Dragons honour roll.

He then filled his other pocket with the leading goalkicker medallion.

On a gala evening littered with witty speeches and humouress asides, the Dragons bestowed awards on their best and most dedicated. Nathan Byrne took the coveted Best Clubman award for his herculean efforts at the helm of the all-conquering Dragons 2007 outfit. The award came as a major surprise to the tireless President, who had expected his very, very, very close friend treasurer Nico to grab the medallion for his continued reluctance to fiddle the books.

Justin Faulkner was the deserved winner of the coaches award, as recognition of his selfless contribution to the club throughout the year. Whether holding individuals together through his physio work or forging the fitness of those took part in the gruelling midweek training sessions, the club games record holder continues to function at the heart of the club. In his acceptance speech, Forks, apropos to nothing at all, took the opportunity to slate the President's lacklustre performance in the recent 100km Trailwalker.

Johnno Worthey took home the Best Newcomer award for his stellar season, in an award that, given the influx of new talent this year, was arguably the most open award of the evening.

Craig 'Bogan' Francis was presented with a Fremantle jumper signed by the entire team for his on-going services to the club as Media Manager.

The crowd of about 50 people had a cracking evening, despite the presence of some very scary moustaches. Lips, doing his bit for Cathay's Mo-vember Madness, resembled burt Reynolds circa his Cannonball Run days. Besty was unable to attend, so Chopper Reid accepted his awards on Besty's behalf.

After all that, everyone got smashed.